Wednesday, 8 November 2017


Are you easily bored? Like a teenager, say? "CBA," says our youngest teenager, when I ask him if he'd like to jump on the tube and join us for dinner after we've seen The Death of Stalin at the cinema. 

If you don't speak Teen 'CBA' loosely translates as: I am experiencing an overwhelming ennui and cannot muster the enthusiasm to lift my arse from where it is permanently situated here in front of this Xbox/computer game/smart phone to join you for a meal and some, you know, like, actual conversation. 

I reckon I no longer have the luxury of boredom because I don't have time on my side. If you don't speak Mid Life this loosely translates as: grab every experience you can and squeeze every last drop out of it because your time is running out, my friend.

"Oh, but you do have the luxury of boredom!" Says my mate Jim, when we're sitting in the audience at the London Palladium on an evening out watching Michael Kiwanuka's support act and having a moan about our teenagers. "You just said this support act was boring five minutes ago." 

"I said she was boring compared to Joni Mitchell," I say, "who she is trying to be. Not the same thing." 

"And only last week you said you found Bladerunner 2049 boring." 

True. I did. Especially if you compare it to Bladerunner, which I don't think you should. I also found The Death of Stalin boring, in parts. All the parts that came after the death of Stalin. 

So this gets me musing all week on the subject of boring...

On Monday evening I don't find watching Stranger Things on Netflix boring, but then I am watching the last few episodes of Season 1 on my laptop in order to be able to get on with Season 2 on the telly, which our youngest teenager tells me is definitely not boring, in fact it's one of the things he's happy to sit on his arse all day watching. 

I don't find the final of The Great British Bake off on Channel 4 boring, even though I already know who won it when I sit down to watch it and she is pretty boring, especially compared to Nadiya who won it last year. I like it when they get all emotional and cry at the end, which this one doesn't, this time the presenter does that for us, so I guess that's win win, and not boring.

Wednesday night I don't find listening to Gwendoline Riley reading an extract from her novel First Love at The Goldsmiths Prize evening boring, but I do find Will Self reading an extract from his novel, Phone, boring. But this is because it's a 600 page paragraph of boring. Everything he says after reading it isn't boring though, it's just irritating. 

At a fireworks party at the weekend I don't find the company boring, or the nibbles, which are both tasty and entertaining, and featured at the top of this blog post, and also here...

But when my mate Jay turns to me and says, "Don't you just love fireworks? I love fireworks!" I think, meh, to be honest, after the first five minutes of fireworks I find them pretty boring. 

Maybe I'm more like our youngest teenager than I thought. Although he did come and join us for that dinner after all, and he talked, which was the least boring part of my week.

Love E x


No P.S. CBA.

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